Forgiveness is one of the most profound and challenging teachings in Christianity. People often wonder why it’s so central to the faith, especially when forgiving someone who has hurt you deeply feels almost impossible. It’s painful, and that’s precisely where many people get confused. Christianity seems to encourage a path of turning the other cheek, never seeking revenge, and constantly absorbing pain without making others “pay” for their sins. But here’s the key: forgiveness isn’t about making others feel better about what they’ve done, and it’s certainly not your job to make them pay for their sins. That’s God’s work.
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At the heart of forgiveness is the understanding that we are all sinners. We all fall short, no matter how big or small our mistakes. One of the clearest demonstrations of this comes from a famous moment in the Bible. A group of men brought a woman caught in adultery to Jesus, a serious sin in Christianity. Adultery was considered so grave that the law demanded she be stoned to death. The accusers asked Jesus if they should carry out the sentence. Jesus simply replied, “Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.”
This moment is powerful because it reminds us that none of us has the right to judge others for their sins. Jesus didn’t condemn the woman; He pointed out that we are all flawed and in need of grace. The point wasn’t to let the woman off the hook — it was to show that forgiveness is not our job to give, but God’s. God judges, we forgive.
And why do we forgive? Not for the other person’s sake, but for our own. When you’re hurt by someone, especially if the pain is deep, it can weigh heavily on your heart. You feel anger, resentment, and a desire for revenge, but this only keeps you tethered to the pain. The moment you forgive someone truly and from the heart, you release that weight. You free yourself. Forgiveness is about you reclaiming peace and healing, not about excusing another’s behavior.
I remember a time in my life when I was deeply hurt by someone. It took time, but once I forgave them, it felt like a huge burden had been lifted. I could breathe again. And this is why many people who come to Jesus are often those who have been hurt deeply. They find in Him not just salvation but healing through forgiveness.
A powerful quote by Andy Stanley sums it up well: “Forgiveness is not to make the other person feel better about what they did. It is just understanding that one flawed soul forgives another flawed soul.” When you forgive, you are not excusing the wrongs done to you, but acknowledging that we are all imperfect, and forgiveness is part of our walk with Christ.
Now, as Christians, we don’t live to please others, but to please God. This idea is captured beautifully in Galatians 1:10: “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Seeking redemption from other people is a mistake. We are to seek forgiveness and redemption from God for our own mistakes. And part of that redemption is offering forgiveness to others. You free yourself by forgiving, and God can then judge others in His perfect way.
Holding onto resentment and anger toward others makes it harder to walk with Jesus. These negative emotions cloud your spirit and prevent you from truly embracing the love, peace, and grace that Christianity calls us to. In fact, if you constantly harbor anger, you’re not walking the narrow path that leads to peace and joy.
Forgiveness is also about following Christ’s example. Jesus forgave those who crucified Him and even asked God to forgive them. Christians are called to emulate this example. We are part of the body of Christ, and as His followers, we are called to forgive just as He forgave. The Lord’s Prayer emphasizes this — “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”
Forgiveness is a central theme in many of Jesus’ parables. Take the parable of the prodigal son or the unforgiving servant. Both stories teach us that if we are forgiven by God, we must also forgive others. Forgiveness is not just an act, but a way of life. To live like Christ is to embody His grace, love, and humility, extending those same qualities to others, especially when they hurt us.
Consider marriage, for example. In Christianity, the vow “for better or worse” holds great significance. If your spouse hurts you, even deeply, you are called to forgive. Yes, there are circumstances where divorce is allowed, such as in cases of infidelity, but even in these situations, forgiveness should be considered. If your spouse shows true remorse and repents, forgiveness is the right path. A relationship cannot last without forgiveness — keeping score of wrongs or harboring anger will only poison it.
The same is true in all relationships. Whether it’s family, friends, or strangers, you cannot experience peace if you’re constantly holding grudges or seeking revenge. Resentment only weighs you down and keeps you from living the joyful, peaceful life God intends for you. Christianity teaches that forgiveness is foundational to a healthy, godly life. It’s one of the hardest aspects to live out, but it’s also the key to true freedom.
In conclusion, forgiveness is a fundamental part of walking with Christ. It’s not about excusing others or letting them off the hook, but about freeing your own heart and soul. It’s a powerful tool that allows you to live in peace, free from the weight of anger and resentment. And as you forgive, you become more like Christ, who forgave us all, offering us salvation and the opportunity for redemption. Forgiveness, though tough, is at the very core of Christianity, and it’s what sets us on the path to healing, peace, and joy.
